Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween!

Brenda, what a good idea! Since you took my advice I will listen to you and post a really cool Ryan Adams song just for halloween. Because I can. If you are easily offended maybe you won't want to listen. It's kinda a little bit about the way I used to live my life. Well, for right now, both Ryan and I are clean and without Halloween Heads which is nice. Wishin' I had some candy corn though.

Ryan Adams

Here comes that shit again
I've got a halloweenhead
Head full of tricks and treats
It leads me thru the nighttime streets
Black cats and falling trees
Under ladders always walking
Salt shaker spills just throw it over your shoulder, babe

I've got a bad idea again,
i've got aHalloweenhead, halloweenhead

Head full of candy bags
Costume shops and punks in drag
Head full of tricks and treats
Places where junkies meet
And it leads me thru streets at night
That's alright, i just watch i don't go inside

It's all the same old shit again
I got a halloweenhead
I got a halloweenhead
Lord, i got a halloweenhead

Guitar solo

I got a halloweenhead
Lord, i've got a halloweenhead
I got a halloweenhead
Oh lord, i've got a halloweenhead

Here comes that shit again
I've gota halloweenhead
Head of tricks and treats
It leads me thru the nighttime streets
I've got a halloweenhead
Lord, i've got a halloweenhead
What the fuck's wrong with me,
God i'm a halloweenhead

Wednesday, October 29, 2008


Anyone else struggling to stay civil as the election draws near? I know that I have had to hold my tongue (or my fingers) a few times in the last couple of days. Our passions are becoming more inflamed as Election Day fast approaches. Whether you are a democrat or a republican, a liberal or a conservative, things are quickly becoming hot and words noticeably shorter.

Let's face it. We all have our issues. The beliefs and thoughts that define us. Some of this comes from our family. Some from life experience. Some from religious values that we have adopted. I'm sure that my world view as a 40 something, white, recovering addict, lower middle class (I hate to say poor because I think I do the real poor an injustice), Christ following man is much different than a 30 something, black, educated, Muslim woman. Or any of the vagaries in between.

For me, it's not even really an issue of what I believe or who I believe in. The real issue is how do I handle myself with the grace that God would want from me. Do I attack people for not thinking along the same views that I do? Should I let them know that I am horrified that anyone would want us to maintain the status quo? Even that last sentence is a shot that I should probably remove but I won't. I guess that's my humanness showing through.

To those that don't see things the same way that I do here's what I'm going to do. I am going to love you. I am going to turn the other cheek if you strike me even if I want to fire right back at you. I am going to pray for you. Not that you come around to my point of view but that you get whatever it is you are looking for. I'm going to work on the log in my eye and not worry about the splinter in yours. I am going to respect the fact that even brothers and sisters in Christ can disagree.

Why? Because I think that's what Jesus would want of me. I don't think that He needs me to hold others accountable for their actions. He does just fine. I think that those are the things that He asks me to do in The Bible. I think that one of His main messages was to be accountable for MY thoughts and actions and not others. I think that He wants me to be compassionate and merciful. To drop the rock and walk away.

It's sad to me that I even have to write a post like this. I'm only doing it as a reminder to myself that I always need to handle myself in a way that brings glory and honor to my Savior. To make sure that my heart and my mind are always seeking Him first. OK, I'm laughing a little at myself. It's also a post to maybe remind some of my more bellicose Brothers and Sisters what we are really all about. Who am I trying to kid?

Anyways, if you are reading this I just want to let you know that I love you and Christ loves you and because of that I can agree to disagree with you yet still want only good things for you and yours. God bless.

Monday, October 27, 2008


I love this song. It always seems to be banging around in my head. Isn't it catchy, I'm always singing the outro. You know, the "it's allll, it's alll, it's all because of you....". I must make my wife crazy. In fact, I'm pretty sure of it.

All Because of Jesus

Steve Fee

giver of every breath I breathe
author of all eternity
giver of every perfect thing
to you be the glory

maker of heaven and of earth
no one can comprehend your worth
king over all the universe
to you be the glory

I'm alive because i'm alive in You
it's all because of Jesus I'm alive
it's all because the blood of Jesus Christ
that cover's me and raised this dead man's life
it's all because of Jesus I'm alive

every sunrise sings Your praise
the universe cries out your praise
i'm singing freedom all my days
now that I'm alive

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Wednesday Words

I've been so busy reading everybody else's blogs that I almost forgot today was Wednesday. Actually, I'm not that excited about today. Why, you ask? OK, you didn't but I will tell you anyway. I have to go to the dentist.

Not only am I going to the dentist. I'm heading south of the border to the dentist. Ay yi yi! Not that I'm really afraid of the dentist that I'm going to (she's absolutely cool and does great work) or even that I'm afraid of the dentist. I'm not particularly fond of heading across the border anymore. There's been so much violence in TJ lately that you get that impending feeling of doom before you head down there. At least I do.

The good side is that we are finally getting around to fixing my teeth. They are such a mess from all the drug and alcohol abuse, non care and smoking that I did in the past. I can't wait to have a new set of choppers. If you notice in my pictures I rarely smile for the camera or if I do it's only a half smile. It's not because I'm a tough guy, it's because I'm a vain guy.

I know this sounds silly but pray for me today. That we get to and from Mexico safely and that we can get together on a plan with the dentist that we can afford. We have dental insurance through Letty's job but it only covers 60% of the services. I have no idea what it's going to cost. The other upside of this is once I get my teeth fixed I'll be more comfortable playing music out again as well as maybe think about getting back into white collar work. The wear and tear on my body from lifting heavy stuff 8 hours a night is starting to take it's toll on me.

That's all I got. I hope everyone is having a great week!

Monday, October 20, 2008


Alright here's a song that I couldn't find the video for. The reason is that Prince doesn't dig Youtube. Or any other tube that he ain't getting paid. That being said, it's still such an awesome song. I loved Prince when I was in my late teens and early 20's. I loved how he mixed spirituality with sexuality and made it all come out so psychedelic and groovy. This track was off the album Sign O' The Times. I think it might have been his best overall, although I really dug his early stuff too. Let's see if this link will work.

Get this widget Track details eSnips Social DNA

The Cross

Black day, stormy night
No love, no hope in sight
Don't cry, he is coming
Don't die without knowing the cross

Ghettos 2 the left of us
Flowers 2 the right
There'll be bread 4 all of us
If we can just bear the cross

Sweet song of salvation
A pregnant mother sings
She lives in starvation
Her children need all that she brings

We all have our problems
Some BIG, some are small
Soon all of our problems
Will be taken by the cross

Black day, stormy night
No love, no hope in sight
Don't cry 4 he is coming
Don't die without knowing the cross

Ghettos 2 the left of us
Flowers 2 the right
There'll be bread 4 all, y'all
If we can just, just bear the cross, yeah

We all have our problems
Some are BIG, some are small
Soon all of our problems, y'all
Will be taken by the cross

The cross
The cross

Anybody else have an artist that you wouldn't normally associate with Jesus busting out a Christian song?

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Wednesday Words, late edition!

Didn't have it in me to do any typing yesterday. I'm not sure why. A little October laziness I suppose. Is there such a thing?

I think that I finally have the car figured out. It's running so let's see how long that will last. I'm happy about that, now I don't have to use Letty's car. I'm sure that she's happy as well!

One really cool thing that happened this week is that we are sponsoring a child from Compassion International. I just got convicted when I was reading Anne Jackson's blog post about it yesterday. We aren't rich by any means but I do know that we are richer than most other places in the world. It's nice to be able to throw a little love and prayer across the world to a child that could use it. How often do we get a chance to make a real difference in someones life. I love that!

I've been doing a lot of praying and reading of my Bible this week as well. I'm in the last part of Exodus which is like pulling teeth. Isn't that a horrible thing to say? Actually it's starting to pick up steam as the Israelites built a golden calf and God wasn't having any of that. He's a jealous God! I need to remember that as well. I'm constantly putting false idols in place of God. Whether it's money, poker, football, the internet, guitar, or whatever I usually find a way to put it in place of God. I'm getting better though.

It sure was fun watching the Chargers beat the snot out of the Patriots Sunday night. Although not as fun as if they had their whole team playing. Nonetheless, it was fun. Hopefully we can keep things roll against the Bills and then they are off to London for a game against New Orleans.

I was on a pretty good roll playing poker but have been in a mini slump the last couple of days. I think maybe I'm a little burnt out and need to stop for a day or two. We'll see about that. Hope everyone is doing well, especially Brenda who just went through a little surgery. Throw some prayers her way or better yet, stop in to her blog and say hi!

Monday, October 13, 2008


Oh man, this is a good one. I'm sitting around the house thinking about what should I put on here. It's song of the week Monday, for crying out loud! I'm also whipping butt on poker and reading everybody's weekend updates on their blogs so it's a good day. I start thinking about what was the first really "Christian" music I ever listened to. Stryper? No! Then it came to me. Of course!

Jesus Christ Superstar. I'm not sure if other Christians dig this movie or not but I sure do. The singing and dancing are phenomenal. Ted Neeley plays Jesus, Carl Anderson is Judas, and Yvonne Elliman is Mary Magdalene. They are all so young and just full of the spirit. I think that it got a negative review from Christians when it first came out because it was such a radical departure from anything about Jesus that had come before. He wasn't a perfect Jesus. He was human. He could also sing like an, well, like an angel. Or better. He's Jesus after all.

The hardest part was picking out one song. So I didn't. I picked out 4. One from all the main characters. The first one on here is probably my favorite. Yvonne Elliman sings it. "I Don't Know How to Love Him". If I could only pick one song this would be it.

Lyrics:...Close your eyes close your eyes
and forget all about us tonight.


I don't know how to love him. What to do, how to move him. I've been changed, yes really changed. In these past few days, when I've seen myself, I seem like someone else.I don't know how to take this. I don't see why he moves me. He's a man. He's just a man. And I've had so many men before, In very many ways, He's just one more.Should I bring him down? Should I scream and shout? Should I speak of love, Let my feelings out? I never thought I'd come to this. What's it all about?Don't you think it's rather funny, I should be in this position. I'm the one who's always been So calm, so cool, no lover's fool, Running every show. He scares me so.I never thought I'd come to this. What's it all about?Yet, if he said he loved me, I'd be lost. I'd be frightened. I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope. I'd turn my head. I'd back away. I wouldn't want to know. He scares me so. I want him so. I love him so.

OK, check out the dancing and singing in this next scene. It's Simon the Zealot trying to convince Jesus to overthrow Rome. Larry Marshall is doing the singing and dancing in this one.


Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God So tell me that I'm saved.Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God So tell me that I'm saved.Jesus I am with you. Touch me, touch me, Jesus. Jesus I am on your side. Kiss me, kiss me, Jesus.


Christ, what more do you need to convince you That you've made it, and you're easily as strong As the filth from Rome who rape our country, And who've terrorized our people for so long.CROWDJesus I am with you. Touch me, touch me, Jesus. Jesus I am on your side. Kiss me, kiss me, Jesus.Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God, So tell me that I'm saved.Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God, So tell me that I'm saved.Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God, So tell me that I'm saved.Christ you know I love you. Did you see I waved? I believe in you and God, So tell me that I'm saved.Jesus I am with you. Touch me, touch me, Jesus. Jesus I am on your side. Kiss me, kiss me, Jesus.


There must be over fifty thousand Screaming love and more for you. And everyone of fifty thousand Would do whatever you asked them to. Keep them yelling their devotion, But add a touch of hate at Rome. You will rise to a greater power. We will win ourselves a home. You'll get the power and the glory For ever and ever and ever You'll get the power and the glory For ever and ever and ever You'll get the power and the glory For ever and ever and ever You'll get the power and the glory For ever and ever and ever Forever Amen! Amen!

The next scene is Judas after he turns over Jesus to the Pharisees. I don't know how Carl Anderson wasn't nominated for an academy award for this performance. He was soooooo good. Did I mention how much I dig the music in all of this? It was written by Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber. They sound familiar to you?


Now if I help you, it matters that you see These sordid kinda things are coming hard to me. It's taken me some time to work out what to do. I weighed the whole thing out before I came to you. I have no thought at all about my own reward. I really didn't come here of my own accord. Just don't say I'm ... damned for all time.I came because I had to; I'm the one who saw. Jesus can't control it like he did before. And furthermore I know that Jesus thinks so too. Jesus wouldn't mind that I was here with you. I have no thought at all about my own reward. I really didn't come here of my own accord. Just don't say I'm ... damned for all time.Annas, you're a friend, a worldly man and wise. Caiaphas, my friend, I know you sympathise. Why are we the prophets? Why are we the ones Who see the sad solution - know what must be done? I have no thought at all about my own reward. I really didn't come here of my own accord. Just don't say I'm damned for all time.

Cut the protesting, forget the excuses. We want information. Get up of the floor.


We have the papers we need to arrest him. You know his movements. We know the law.


Your help in this matter won't go unrewarded.


We'll pay you in silver, cash on the nail. We just need to know where the soldiers can find him.


With no crowd around him.


Then we can't fail.


I don't want your blood money!


Oh, that doesn't matter, our expenses are good.


I don't need your blood money!


But you might as well take it. We think that you should.


Think of the things you could do with that money, Choose any charity - give to the poor. We've noted your motives. We've noted your feelings. This isn't blood money - it's a ...




A fee nothing more.


On Thursday night you'll find him where you want him. Far from the crowds, in the Garden of Gethsemane.


Well done Judas. Good old Judas.

Oops, I goofed up. Wrong song. That was before he gave Jesus up. Here's after. BONUS video!

This looks like a two parter my computer is messing up.

So what's your favorite Jesus movie?

Friday, October 10, 2008

Live Blog: Creating a song

OK, here's something I've never tried before. Live blogging a song. I was messing with my guitar and just playing this little riff. I have the guitar capoed at the second fret. I'm playing kind of a C to D chord pattern, pulling off of my my middle finger in the C cord about halfway through the strum pattern, pretty common for me. Actually maybe the last note of the c strum I pull off. I'm muting the strings with my picking hand and I'm picking with my fingers, giving it that staccato sound. Lord knows if I'm spelling this stuff right. 10/9 12:19pm

I'm humming a little melody to the chords, now I need to dive into a chorus. I'm going with G, Am, C, D, pretty standard progression it might change. Let's see if I can throw some words on top of this puppy. 12:22pm

You held me
Through the storm
You loved me
Through the fire
You saved me
In my darkest hour
You led me
Through the valley

First verse? 12:36

I think the 3rd and 4th what are they called? stanza's? need to be reversed. To where it's You led me, and then you saved me. Now to the chorus, I think sometimes thats the hardest part to write. 12:40pm

My Rock and my Salvation
Through every generation
A cause for celebration Hmmm, sounds ok when I play it. 1:10pm

My Savior and Redeemer
To whom I seem so eager
To raise my hands to ....


kind of weak but try and find something to fit with redeemer, ugh! Remember, these are just beginning ideas, ok, I've got to go to sleep! 1:33pm

Thursday, October 9, 2008

One More Time

One More Time
66ohm-bub ©2001

And as the tears start falling
And as the world keeps spinning
And as my heart keeps breaking
I need a new beginning

I'll give you diamond brilliance
I'll give you words that sing
I'll make the world stop turning
G5 Em
If I could have you to hold

One more time
For old time's sake
Em D
Go ahead and leave me
G Csus2
See how much more I can take
Em D Em D Em D

Verse two:
And as the clock keeps ticking
And as the sun keeps shining
And as my eyes are blinded
I need a new beginning

I'll give you amber sunsets
I'll give you words that sing
I'll make the clouds stop covering
If I could have you to hold

Capo on 2nd fret

This is the best I could do with the chords, it's pretty close to what I actually play. Man, that is a lot harder to do than it looks, I will tell you that.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Wednesday words Vol. #5

Even though my car is refusing many attempts and dollars at getting it back into running condition, the week is still going pretty well. Having two cars is definitely a good thing. Letty seems to think it's the battery now but I'm not sure. I'm hoping it's not the starter or some other kind of electrical problem.

I think this might be a rant which if you have been following my blog at all is not a normal posting technique. But c'mon. Is anyone else watching these debates between the candidates and thinking what kind of fools do they take us for? Maybe they have us pegged exactly right. Tell 'em what they want to hear.

The economic bailout package that they passed for the mortgage industry blows my mind. Mind you, both of the candidates voted in FAVOR of this as they are telling you how they are going to reduce taxes and change health care and still actively promote wars on two fronts. Where in the world is this money supposed to be coming from? In fact, after the house of representatives (what a bunch of crooked people) voted against the original bill I thought, wow, our representatives are actually making a stand. Come to find out, all they wanted was a little pork thrown into the bill before they would pass it. It makes me sick to think that these are the people that are running my country.

The thing is you have to vote for someone. It's really a chore this year. Thank God there's one person that makes this an easy decision this year. It's probably not who you think and not for the reasons that a lot of my more conservative Christian brethren would make their decisions on. Unless you are on my myspace. Then you would know for sure which way I was voting.

Where is Jesus in all of this? Personally, I think He's standing there scratching His head wondering how he's involved in any of this. Let's see. Love your neighbor. Pull the plank out of your own eye. Render unto Caesar's what is Caesars. What good does it do to gain the whole world but to lose one's soul? Feed the hungry. Take care of the poor. Those are the kind of things Jesus cared about. Forgive. I have to do a lot of forgiving every day. As well as ask for a lot of forgiveness as well.

I think the ironic thing is that if Jesus came into this world today He would be laughed right out of the Church. Probably kicked out once He started going on about how it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. I just hope that He wouldn't kick over the mocha machine on His way into my church on Sunday. I love me my Frozen Mochas.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Poker Brag

If anyone remembers my bankroll before august 27th was nothing. If you look over to the right you will now see that I have taken nothing and turned it into $20. A cool little milestone. That could buy me like 6 mochas or iced mochas at Journey. I could take Letty to a movie if we didn't eat anything. We could maybe squeeze in a lunch at Denny's. It could be the buy in at a tournament at Viejas. A delivered pizza from Round Table (if I have the coupon). A half a tank of gas. Five Red Baron frozen pizzas. Six gallons of milk. Needless to say, a ton of fun.

Monday, October 6, 2008


This was the first song after I started going to Journey with Letty that really caught my attention. It's by Charlie Hall and it's called Marvelous Light. I'm a little tired so that's all that you are getting out of me today. Have a great week!

Marvelous Light

Charlie Hall

Verse 1
I once was fatherless,
a stranger with no hope;
Your kindness wakened me,
Awakened me, from my sleep

Verse 2
Your love it beckons deeply,
a call to come and die.
By grace now I will come
And take this life, take your life.

Sin has lost it's power,
death has lost it's sting.
From the grave you've risen

Into marvelous light I'm running,
Out of darkness, out of shame.
By the cross you are the truth,
You are the life, you are the way

Verse 3
My dead heart now is beating,
My deepest stains now clean.
Your breath fills up my lungs.
Now I'm free. now I'm free!

Lift my hands and spin around,
See the light that i have found.
Oh the marvelous light
Marvelous light
Lift my hands and spin
See the light within...

Friday, October 3, 2008

Meeting New Friends and Influencing People

So here's something new that I have been doing lately. I didn't think of it myself, I got it somewhere else. At least the initial idea. If anyone knows let me know so that I can give credit where credit is due. I read too many great blogs.

Oh yeah, the thing. Check this out. I'm always looking for opportunities to further God's Kingdom right? I think one of the best ways for me to do this is prayer. But what to pray for? I'm not real good at long, elegant, intricate prayers. I can do a little short, sweet prayer pretty well though. Here's a great way that I found to find prayees. Ya know, the ones to be prayed on or over or however we go about doing that.

I go to It's a search engine for twitter. I type in the word "pray" into the search window. Guess what happens? A whole list of people to pray for! How cool is that? Of course some of them are like "pray that the Cubs win today." That of course is a prayer that I will have to reject. God does NOT love the cubs.

I say a prayer for or about anyone that needs a prayer on the list. After I do that, I look for the ones that look like they REALLY need some prayer. The ones who you can tell are hurting. Like I have been hurting before. How is it described in the Bible? They moaned? Yeah, those guys. Maybe it was groaned... hmmm I guess I could look it up. Wait, I digress.

These people, these moaners or groaners (which I mean with all due respect, I believe the original meaning of the word was something along the lines of a physical cry to God for help which a lot of times I am too prideful to utter, although I have) I click on their little blue link button. Because most people on twitter are geeks like myself, they have a link on their profile to their website or blog. I then proceed to their website (usually a blog) and leave 'em a little note saying Hey and let them know that someone indeed is praying for them. Again, as long as it's not a prayer for the Cubs, Raiders, Yankees, Broncos, BYU, Dodgers, Giants, Diamondbacks, Rockies, Chiefs ummm anyway, you get the point. That's the meeting new friends part.

The influencing people? I think that when you are praying for someone or something you are giving the best influence that you can. Asking God for something for another person is as real an influential thing as it gets. I wish I could take that last sentence back, but you know what I'm talking about even if I can't get the words out of my fingers correctly.

Thank you God for the opportunity to be of true service to people with my little acts of prayer. I know that you are listening to your people as you always have and through your kindness and love for us answer them whether it's what we were asking for or not. Help me Lord to be an instrument of prayer so that others may come to believe that You are. Amen.

How do you find people and events to pray about?

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Mr. Postman

I heard a knock on the door. Then a quick scuffling of feet down the stairs. I opened the door and what did I find?

I quickly scooped up the envelope and hurried inside. I locked the door behind me. I didn't want anyone to find out that I had this:

Needless to say I was in a state of shock and awe at my wonderful luck!



I was excited as a schoolgirl on Christmas morning as I tore open the package. It was all here. The complete Stacy From Louisville Bible College Survival Pack. The Pocket protector, the floaties, the pantyhose (which incidentally were never explained) even the nose candy (not what you are thinking, get your minds out of the gutter). So naturally, actually more like unnaturally, I had to try everything on.

Can you believe it? As soon as I put it on I could feel psalms and proverbs were getting ready to proverbially come flying out of my mouth! Anyways, much thanks for the wonderful gift package, If only I had received my honorary diploma I would have been set.